Festival Porta Potty Survival Guide: Tips for Attendees

Music festivals, outdoor concerts, fairs, food festivals - they're amazing. The porta potties at these events? Often not so much. But with a little strategy, you can make the experience a lot more bearable.

Here's everything I've learned about navigating festival porta potties like a pro.

Timing Is Everything

The single biggest factor in your porta potty experience is when you go. Here's the pattern:

If you can, plan your bathroom breaks around the performance schedule. When everyone rushes to the bathrooms between sets, stay at your spot. Go when the music's playing and the lines are short.

Scout the Locations

Not all porta potty banks are equal. When you arrive at the festival:

• Check multiple locations - There's usually more than one area with bathrooms
• Look for hidden spots - The ones furthest from main stages often have shorter lines
• Note the freshly serviced units - Service trucks do rounds during the festival
• Remember the layout - You'll be finding these in the dark later

Pro tip: The units closest to the entrance are often the most heavily used. Walk past the first row and check the back.

What to Bring

A little preparation goes a long way. Pack these in a small bag:

Porta Potty Technique

Once you're in there, here's how to make it quick and sanitary:

The Hover vs. Sit Debate

Hovering seems cleaner, but it often leads to more mess for the next person. If the seat looks clean, wiping it down and sitting is actually more hygienic than a shaky hover. If it's visibly dirty, hover or move on to another unit.

Keep Your Stuff Safe

Before you do anything:

• Put your phone in a secure pocket (not in your hand)
• Check that nothing will fall out of pockets
• Hook bags on the door hook if there is one
• Don't set anything on the floor

The Quick Exit

Have everything ready before you touch the door handle:

• Sanitizer in one hand
• Use elbow or tissue to unlatch the door
• Sanitize immediately after exiting

Avoiding the Worst Units

Quick checks before you commit:

• Check the door indicator - Green means vacant and freshly cleaned (sometimes)
• Look at the ground outside - Wet or muddy ground = likely messy inside
• Trust your nose - If the smell hits you from outside, move on
• Peek before locking - Take a quick look before committing

It's okay to nope out and try the next one. People do it all the time.

The VIP Option

Many festivals offer VIP tickets or upgrades that include access to nicer restroom facilities. Is it worth it? Consider:

• VIP restroom trailers - Often air-conditioned with flushing toilets and running water
• Shorter lines - Way fewer people have access
• Better maintenance - Cleaned more frequently
• Actual mirrors and lighting - You can see what you're doing

If bathroom quality is important to your festival enjoyment (no shame in that), the VIP upgrade might be worth exploring.

Late Night Strategy

The later it gets, the worse the conditions. After midnight:

• Use the buddy system - Have someone hold the door or wait nearby
• Bring a light - Many units don't have interior lighting
• Lower your expectations - Units have had a full day of heavy use
• Consider the walk - The units farthest from the party are often in better shape

Balancing Hydration and Bathroom Trips

Here's the festival dilemma: you need to stay hydrated (especially in summer heat), but every drink means another bathroom trip. Some tips:

• Hydrate early - Drink plenty before the fest and early in the day
• Sip, don't chug - Steady intake is easier to manage than downing a bottle
• Time your drinks - Drink right after a bathroom break for maximum time before the next one
• Don't skip water to avoid bathrooms - Dehydration is way worse than porta potty lines

Note for Festival Organizers

If you're running a festival and want happy attendees, here's what matters for porta potty satisfaction:

• Quantity - More units = shorter lines = happier people
• Service frequency - Daily minimum, twice daily for large events
• Placement - Spread units throughout the venue, not just one area
• Lighting - Put lights near the porta potties for nighttime
• Hand wash stations - People want to wash their hands properly

Your restroom setup directly impacts how people remember your event. It's worth investing in.

Final Tips

• Go before you desperately need to - Lines are unpredictable
• Stay positive - It's part of the festival experience
• Leave it better than you found it - Close the lid, don't leave trash
• Tip the attendant - If there's someone cleaning, a buck or two goes a long way